Sports & Culture Sports & Culture

Please keep these things in mind:

  • NEVER DRINK AND DRIVE!! You will end up killing yourself, or worse, someone else. Don't be stupid. If you're going out and plan to drink, give the car keys to someone else and take a taxi back home.
  • If the law in your country says you're too young to drink, don't.
  • Do not drink too much. Alcohol poisoning may be lethal.
  • If you have a problem with drinking, seek professional help.
Beer Snap
Beer Pong
Beer Checkers
Question
Light Beer
To drink
Selling Beer ?
Beer at Work
Pint Less
Drunk Driving Test
BEER SNAP

This game is based around that popular card game, Snap. For people who are not familiar with the game, the rules are as follows:

First off, the idea of the game is to win all the cards. A deck of cards is dealt between 2 people, they then take it in turn to place a card between themselves, onto a pile.

If a card placed on the pile matches the previous card's value, it is race to see which player can shout "snap" first. The player who says "snap" first wins the cards present in the pile.

Beer snap is almost the same, but when 2 card values match, and the first player to shout "snap" has been established, the player to shout last has to drink the following amounts of beer from a big (pint) glass:

Value:
2 - 6 -- 1 finger
7 - 10 -- 2 fingers
Face card -- 3 fingers

The game is best played in a big group, on a "winner stays on" basis.

BEER PONG

The materials you need for this game are some cups of beer, a ping pong ball, and a table. The game is best played with either two people or two teams of two.

Arrange the cups of beer on either side of the table like you are setting up bowling pins. You should have at least six cups on both sides. Each team takes a turn by trying to get the ping pong ball into the other team's cups. If they succeed the other teams must drink that cup. The cup is then removed and the rest of the cups are rearranged so that they are close to each other. Each team alternates turns like this.

When all the cups on one side have been cleared the team that cleared them wins and the other teams must finish any cups remaining on the winning team's side.

BEER CHECKERS

You'll need plastic cups and a checker board with spaces the size of the cups. It's easiest to use part of a big cardboard box and cover it in clear contact paper so you won't have to make one again. The game is set up and played just like regular checkers, except that each person has cups filled half way with beer for their pieces. It's easiest if you use disposable cups and mark them with different colors.

If one of your men gets jumped, you slam the half beer in the cup and remove it from the board. If you get "kinged" you fill the cup up the rest of the way. If your king gets jumped, you slam the whole beer. When someone wins, the loser has to finish all the cups left on the board. If you play in teams, just divide the number of slams up, or rotate who finishes the beer.

For the weaker drinker shots of beer may be used instead of half beers. When you get kinged, make it a double shot.

" Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. "
-Dave Barry
" People who drink light 'beer' don't like the taste of beer; they just like to pee alot. "
-Capital Brewery, Middleton, WI
" A woman drove me to drink and I didn't even have the decency to thank her. "
-W.C. Fields
SELLING BEER: A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. While chatting with the bartender the man says: “I have a method that will enable you to double the amount of beer you sell every day.” “Really?” says the bartender, “How?” “Very simple. Just pour full glasses.” joke source

BEER AT WORK

It's an incentive to show up.

It reduces stress.

It leads to more honest communications.

It reduces complaints about low pay.

Employees tell management what they think, not what management wants to hear.

It encourages carpooling.

Increase job satisfaction because if you have a bad job, you don't care.

It eliminates vacations because people would rather come to work.

It makes fellow employees look better.

It makes the cafeteria food taste better.

Salary negotiations are a lot more profitable.

Suddenly, burping during a meeting isn't so embarrassing.

Employees work later since there's no longer a need to relax at the bar.

It makes everyone more open with their ideas.

Employees no longer need coffee to sober up.

Sitting on the copy machine will no longer be seen as "gross"

PINT LESS: A guy walks into a bar and approaches the barman, "Can I have a pint of Less, please?"

"I'm sorry sir," the barman replies, looking slightly puzzled, "I've not come across that one before. Is it a spirit?"

"I've no idea," replies the guy, "The thing is, I went to see my doctor last week and he told me that I should drink less."

DRUNK DRIVING TEST

A man leaves a bar, gets into his car and drives away. 200 yards further he's stopped by a police officer.

Officer: "Good evening sir. We're testing drivers for drunken driving. Would you please blow into this machine?".

Man: "I'm sorry, I can't do that. I have asthma. If I blow on that machine I will get out of air".

Officer: "Please come along to the office and we can give you a blood test."

Man: "I can't do that. I have anemia and if you stick a needle in me I will bleed to death".

Officer: "Then you'll have to get out and walk 5 yards along this white line".

Man: "Can't do that either."

Officer: "Why not?"

Man: "Because I'm dead drunk!"

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